January represents new beginnings for many people. We make decisions that we hope will change our lives for the better. We look forward to our futures with new insight and hope. For this first Momma Monday I thought I would bring out an oldie but goodie blog post about the newness of parenting a teenager. Enjoy.
I woke up the other day and I had a teenager. Its the strangest thing cause it happened all at once. The birth took me by surprise because I thought I had time to ease into it. I really believed that we would grow older together. I imagined a pleasant process of mother daughter chats and real understanding. Little arugments that were rationally solved like on the Gilmore Girls seemed completely reasonable.
How ironic that in the month that we celebrate fear and dread, I woke up to it. I woke up to mood swings and unfathomable deception, pickiness and pouting. That could all turn around with no involvement from me. I have asked just about everyone I know to take this cup away from me literally. The problem is everyone I have asked has already had their experiences with teenagers and wouldn’t trade that freedom for the world. I guess I had hoped that some people just had a knack for parenting teenagers and could do the job for me. I have no problem paying child support!
So I finally realized that I had to do three things in order to survive this new era peacably. 1) Apologize to my own mother. Now if it is this bad for me it had to come from somewhere. And even if I wasn’t what I percieve as ‘that bad’ its totally different from the mother lens. 2) I had to talk to other moms. Not the nice stuff, oh she’s such a great kid, I had to say ‘this hurts,’ ‘Its scary’ and ‘I can’t find a camp that will take teens until they return to a state of sanity and sense. Do you know of any?’ Then listen to the other moms. What you are going through might not be that bad. Listening to other moms gives you insight that it could be worse or could get worse and you can hear how they have survived without this use of round the clock teen camp. 3) Finally, I had to calm down and realize its not me. Its those dirty little horomones. Those are some nasty little boogers and I really wish we could have the health profession find a cure for them. I could start a national campaign, host walks, runs and marathons in hopes of eradicating of this youthful instability. But until that day comes, I at least know the cause of my anguish and that alone gives me the peace to see past the pain.
So all you mothers of teenagers out there. I feel your pain. I understand your anguish and we can all live thorough this together.