Have you ever been in a position where someone has made a decision about you without your input or consent? They have decided what you can do or cannot do just based on what they see of you or your situation. It happens everyday people kill our dreams just by looking at us. As a matter of fact we do the same to other people. It is a common human reaction to judge others by our surface knowledge of them whether that be sight or circumstantial.
Unfortunately, its not only people that we don’t know who judge us unfairly and have a low opinion on of us it can also be persons close to us. Sometimes the people that we least expect make every effort to keep us in our place and not let us dream big for ourselves.
As a business owner and team builder I do my best to duplicate myself in the business. I want to find people who need a financial outlet who love fashionable accessories. Since its my passion to help women I don’t often search for the women who have it all together although I appreciate them as well as team members and clientele. However, what really excites me is talking to a woman who is struggling, who may not have a job, but really needs income. I want to show her how she is in the perfect position to start a business that can never fire her unless she herself wants to be fired.
Its interesting though that sometimes when I talk about a potential prospect that might not have it all together at the time, that some people will immediately criticize that person’s potential with or without them there. They make a determination on the person’s situation and can’t see a dream for them. So instead they kill the potential dreams of another as well as the dreams that may be dreamt for that person. Usually the killing is done in the name of “reality”.
Its even more frustrating when you see a dream for yourself and you express it to someone close to you and they shoot you not in the back but right in your face. They point the reality gun right at your head and pull the trigger. Usually we can see this happen with our close friends and family who although they want what is best for us they more often than not cannot see past us or our current situation.
Sadly, we can be our own dream killers as well. We can have a dream and then talk ourselves out if it simply because our surroundings don’t reflect what we see in our dreams.
It is important that we keep our imaginations going at all times. Our dreams should be on the forefront of our minds so that we can work towards achieving them. Stay away from dream killers as best as you can. They will always be around lurking and planning to assinate that which will sustain you and move you towards your own greatness.
And be mindful of your own capacity to kill another’s dream. Even if you cannot see in the natural try to see the best potential in a person. It will make all the difference in the lives of the people you touch.
This morning on Good Morning America George Stephanopoulos announced that every state of the US except for FL has snow on the ground somewhere. During this past week various areas in the US have experienced stifling weather that has kept many locked indoors till the storms pass over. Just the mention of snow causes a flood of grocery shoppers to purchase necessities like milk, bread, snacks, etc. As I think about the MD “Snowmagedon” of 2010 I remember how many of us were housebound for up to a week coming out only to shovel snow so that it wasn’t completely overwhelming in the end. For many of us that was the only exercise we may have gotten in that week. It really made me think about how we prepare for storms. Wise or not, many people have a hibernation mentality “when the storm hits I’m going to eat and sleep till it’s over”. Well I would like to propose a challenge that the next time your weatherperson predicts snow, instead of just buying the food essentials you also pick up a $10 workout video from Wal-Mart. Get your body moving during the storm. You might not be able to get outside and walk but if you hang out with my good friend Leslie Sansone – You can walk 1-5 miles in your own home. Or you can check the internet to find a few moves that you can do around the house or if you have cable there are some great workouts On Demand. If you can commit to trying to be fit during the winter months you won’t have to work as hard in the spring to slim down for summer.
As I rode slowly home today in the moderate “blizzard” of the day all I could think of was getting home and curling up with warm blanket. I wasn’t prepared to cook a big meal but wanted something tasteful and filling. So this week I went to my trusty Soup Bible. This book of over 500 pages offers me the opportunity to create great meals with flavors that I may never have tried before. Plus it offers way more variety than the processed and preserved soups in the grocery store. So far I have stayed with base flavored soup that I am familiar with like: Leek and Thyme soup, Corn and Potato Chowder and Irish Potato. (You can see I favor potatoes.) Each was delicious but I think next week I will venture into new flavor territory like apple soup and maybe a beet or parsnip soup. Stay tuned we may even do a video blog post so you can see how its done.
I found the Soup Bible at Barnes and Noble in their bargain books. If you can find a copy its a kitchen must.
Happy Tasteful Tuesday.
January represents new beginnings for many people. We make decisions that we hope will change our lives for the better. We look forward to our futures with new insight and hope. For this first Momma Monday I thought I would bring out an oldie but goodie blog post about the newness of parenting a teenager. Enjoy.
I woke up the other day and I had a teenager. Its the strangest thing cause it happened all at once. The birth took me by surprise because I thought I had time to ease into it. I really believed that we would grow older together. I imagined a pleasant process of mother daughter chats and real understanding. Little arugments that were rationally solved like on the Gilmore Girls seemed completely reasonable.
How ironic that in the month that we celebrate fear and dread, I woke up to it. I woke up to mood swings and unfathomable deception, pickiness and pouting. That could all turn around with no involvement from me. I have asked just about everyone I know to take this cup away from me literally. The problem is everyone I have asked has already had their experiences with teenagers and wouldn’t trade that freedom for the world. I guess I had hoped that some people just had a knack for parenting teenagers and could do the job for me. I have no problem paying child support!
So I finally realized that I had to do three things in order to survive this new era peacably. 1) Apologize to my own mother. Now if it is this bad for me it had to come from somewhere. And even if I wasn’t what I percieve as ‘that bad’ its totally different from the mother lens. 2) I had to talk to other moms. Not the nice stuff, oh she’s such a great kid, I had to say ‘this hurts,’ ‘Its scary’ and ‘I can’t find a camp that will take teens until they return to a state of sanity and sense. Do you know of any?’ Then listen to the other moms. What you are going through might not be that bad. Listening to other moms gives you insight that it could be worse or could get worse and you can hear how they have survived without this use of round the clock teen camp. 3) Finally, I had to calm down and realize its not me. Its those dirty little horomones. Those are some nasty little boogers and I really wish we could have the health profession find a cure for them. I could start a national campaign, host walks, runs and marathons in hopes of eradicating of this youthful instability. But until that day comes, I at least know the cause of my anguish and that alone gives me the peace to see past the pain.
So all you mothers of teenagers out there. I feel your pain. I understand your anguish and we can all live thorough this together.
No matter how much someone tells you they love you if you don’t love yourself fully, you will never fully understand their love. Love isn’t always about the other person. What they say to you or do for you doesn’t make a difference if you don’t say and do things for yourself. If you don’t love your insides first it is impossible to love anyone outside of you. Take time today to discover and love you and when you feel full of the love you give yourself you will have an overabundance to share with others.